Positivism is vital

About 2 weeks ago, I met this very friendly uncle. We were seat mates on the flight from Kuching to JB. While I was feeling nostalgic over mountains and rivers, he was clearly jubilant (I later learned that he was on the way to visit one of his daughters)

He talked non-stop over the almost-two-hour-flight. Thanks to him, I wasn't bored at all, and left JB airport with lifted spirits. For some reason, I've been arriving at JB airport with a grumpy mood over the last few months.

He was so stressed on the word positivism ^^ I find that very cute. It's cute that there's still people in the world who cares genuinely for others, and try earnestly to care for them. I don't even know his name, but it was nice talking to you. I'll remember the things you said, don't worry :)

I can have fun with these.

Still feels like I'm going over the border for fun.

What with all the stuff I bring back


Free postcards!
(Now how do I get rid of these??)



Cuppa hot choc at the Bean (plus an embarassing ep at Junction 8 Bishan)

My friend Wei Ling is having memory issues. Me too :(

Peh Tze's daugther Wendy has a very cute laugh.




My observation for today:

When you wash cherry tomatoes and strawberries(from Korea!), the tomatoes sink while strawberries float.

I love a clean room <3

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21st March 2011

I'll miss you a lot.

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不习惯

安七炫- 不习惯

听着的歌，虽然以不标准的华语唱出，却有着能动人的声音，歌词

真贴切，形容着分开后，自己一个人的生活，习惯的一切改变，而身体还来不及适应。 心里的空位一旦被填满，就好象心脏里主要的血管那么重要。一旦被抽空，就会致命。 因为人的惰性，总想找个人来依赖。

依赖，那么的容易。总会觉得那个人是那么的愿意帮自己，总是相信，他一定不会推脱。 是么？ 真的会那么的愿意么? 以为终究是以为。 我的本事实在不大， 没人要我帮忙，是么？ 会做的，也不过如此。人们要求的，往往都是一样。其实已经习惯了，不过有时候真想大喊： 拜托自己学学。

我为了家人，可以义不容辞，不会有怨言。 我的家人是一辈子的家人，他们不会嫌弃我没本事，嫌弃我不会赚钱养家。但你们不是。我从来都不觉得自己是你们的朋友。在你们的眼里，我大概是个大傻，一个总是符合，总是会无条件帮你的大傻。

我会渴望朋友，但朋友真的难寻。

你说错了，我跟你们根本不一样

一个人望着脚底下那片地，想得是什么？ 往前踏一步的勇气，你怎么得到的？

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The wide city

I like this statue at Guangzhou. Mainly because I've stood there, my grandparents stood there and my parents stood there. It's a nice feeling to get, having 3 generations in your family being able enough to stand at such a faraway place. Some more, among so many places in this world, and in China, we went to the same place.


I like this place for more reasons too.


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Getting something

It's been an interesting thing. I don't think I regretted or anything, joining.

Once again, my presentation skills comes into rescue, and earn me a prize. Cept, I might have brought too much of my uni presentation skills in. 'Em say I don't smile a lot.

Why don't I smile? Most of the time, I feel indifferent to anything else. That's why the nothing expression. Some times I seriously think I'm better than you, that's why the nothing expression. Some times I think you're better than me, that's why the nothing expression. Some times I feel like sleeping, in comes the nothing expression too.

What am I saying?

It's great to win something, even if its only a small one. At least, it proves that I'm still good for something, no?

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Hello Hello

Listening to Shinee's Hello, of all things. I still can't get over how annoying Ring Ding Dong was. Hello is good though.

Kind of tired today, especially today. So stressed out till this humongous pimple came on the forehead. Skin INVASION! After tonight, I can heave a breath of relief. Can't wait.

With great advancements come great responsibilities- I feel it, boy do i feel it. Is it good or is it bad? I'll do my best for anything you asked me to, but do give me some support when I needed it. There was nothing to lean on when I come back full of disappointment. That's not what I call unity. We're... maybe, separate entities after all..

Interesting discoveries for the week:

• I know a particular someone who wipes everything on her dark skirt as well. I thought I was the only one doing that. Mentality here: Dark skirt= perfect for wiping choc stains/oil stains=even if cannot wash also cannot be seen.

• I'm always so curious as to where those staircases by roadsides lead to. Duh logic tells me they all lead to graveyards. But I just can't help staring at it and thinking : Ah, I wanna go up there, I wonder what there may be?

• My hands are still peeling and I don't know why.
  

끝너

Join in the Fun, It's worth the wait

Last night I can't wait to get to sleep, so I can wake up as early as possible and get ready for convocation.

Tonight, I can't bear to sleep cause I'm afraid the excitement of today will be sizzled (die out maybe?) after I go into slumberland. Maybe a round of chess with Zhou Gong will enable me to forget about today's experience totally?

Ah, I saw someone writing End of our convocation is held when September ends :)

This year would be special. At least, the whole month would be special. Starting with the hubbub of the ever-changing convocation details, the surprising interview at istana, the very wind-blown interview @ UBD rehearsal, of course, all the pic taking, uploading, tagging in FB. Man I can;t believe that the picture uploading is still going on, and it's already Sunday!

What's more, a bunch of us are going for a class picture on Sunday. I bet it'll be fun. I so want a picture of that board in UBD (which has all of the graduates' names) Looking at it in Facebook makes me want to have a photo of it too, at least, for momento mah, such an expensive board.

I should feel nostalgic? Depressed? Perhaps sad that I'm leaving my years of study. Strangely I feel busy but happy. Not a trace of sadness yet, maybe it's cause I'm still seeing and talking to the same people online? Haha, all the twitter people are still so active. Wait for it, once everyone starts working then the excitement and chatter will dwindle.

I remembered: being heck nervous before going up on stage, and standing right in front of HM was definitely a dizzying experience. Ah I felt like everything was slo-mo for me. It's supposed to feel like that if I were to meet the man of my dreams or something. SOmeone please tell me if this is what falling in love feels like. No, I'm not in love with HM, I'm more of in awe and struck by his charisma, and oh gosh, I have to gush about his good looks.

Not sure if we were too noisy once we got off the stage, but the chatter was good. And ah, much thanks to the marshals for helping too, esp Wardah Azimah <3 Her words of encouragement kinda soothed me before heading up stage, kinda. Too bad we didn't get to take a lot of pictures with everyone due to traffic, family, lunchtime and all other things. Too bad. I liked what Nuridah said in her interview for one of the newspapers: Being in the robe makes the whole thing more real, and the fact that we're really graduating comes on so strong, or something along these lines. That robe may not be likable to some, but hey, we're in something special haha. Unforgettable bwah, we'll take out pictures and discuss about times with safety pins and double tapes and those different colored tudungs. Some peeps would be discussing about... maybe 10 plasters?




Much gratitude goes to everyone who helped me during these 4 years (peers, lecturers, librarian etc) Gd'luck!


COMBO POST
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Today is the day after the day I took pictures with peeps in the studio and also in UBD. Y'know I really can't pass up that gigantic board with all our names on it!

The evening sunrays was just nice. The breeze was just nice. The people was just nice :P That moment I was supposed to go home though, was a bit nostalgic, maybe reality finally set in :) Reality that comes in parts

That part where I don't have to wake up hell early and squeeze traffic with people in my kampong just so I can arrive at lecture theater all sleepy.

That part where classes just get canceled and I'd spend the hour grumbling then maybe off to The Mall and spend a bomb.

That part where we won't hold 'discussions' in classrooms which will somehow end up in munching and internet surfing or gossiping sessions. Haha, maybe throw in some make-up tips seminar into it too.

That part where I don't have to get all sasak with assignment and deadlines. Not to mention about the wrestling I did throughout 4 years with my printer, A4 paper and printer inks.

That part where I'll stroll down to the library and bask in books. Then I'll come out and perhaps meet a classmate or two and they'll go like "wah rajin eh go lib" I'll reply "No lah, borrow story books nia!"

That part whereby every few months or so I'll have to go register and get signatures from lecturers/lecturers-to-be for the semester. And perhaps a trip or two down to the Finance Dept and pay my dues.

There's too many parts, maybe I'll be able to recall all of them, maybe not. Maybe I'll forget some faces, maybe not. Maybes are really only maybes :)




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What is nonchalant?

Convo between my brother and me.

Bro: Guess what?? Big news in JB!
Me: What? Someone died?
Bro: Noooo... on the contrary... there's a new life coming!
Me: Huh?
Bro: Someone's pregnant! ........ one of our younger cousins!
Me: mmhmm.. not such big news. Big news= someone died.
Bro: ................


Nonchalance displayed towards less-concerned issues.

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I like videos

Howdies peoples.

My blog post published on Hari Raya itself, what shall I say?

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri dear friends! Hope y'all enjoy and have a great time eating :)

Speaking of which, I'm on the fence on whether I should go istana this year (it's open right) Ah if so I'd have to go on Saturday morning, which means many many many many x n people. Oh gawrsh.

I have tomorrow to think it out.

Been immersed in the world of Korean dramas and entertainment shows lately. When I don't do anything, open Media Player I go, or to seek for new shows from a certain reliable website. They're all cn-subbed! Yeay! Also chasing after about 4 current drama, all of which I can say is still entertaining so far. But then again, I'm not really the type to discontinue watching something unless I think it really really really sucks (can only rmb one drama I did that to, so far).

On the days I'm not at home, I'm outside working, as a distributor for Amway products, or attending courses and growing my brain with many many water and knowledge and hopefully, a money tree will grow from all these, ka-ching!

The meetings aren't as bad as I thought to be. Once you get to know all the uncles and aunties, they actually radiate such positive energy that I can't help but break a smile when they beam at me. Good environment for a person on Prozac huh?

I'll work hard, who knows I'll be something someday. That'll show you people serious I can be about something.


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In front of my grave

Like that song says, i'd like some flowers planted. I don't mind the kind, but it can be pretty. Some of my mom's cacti can do too, they can remind me of the times we planted and discussed abt flowers. Her cacti have always been light green.

I'll take in with my eyes all the great things nature created, i'll be happy to drink it all in. To be one with them will mean i'm one of the beautiful things too.

눈을 보고

I didn't need a rainbow in the dark.

Listening to: VOS-눈을 보고 말해요 (Look into my eyes and say (?)

It's a sad song. Even though I don't understand much of it. I suppose it means look into my eyes and tell me , tell me that you don't like me (?).

Leaving for KL later on. It's going to be hectic, to rush up and attend seminar everyday. When I come back, it's going to be all meetings and courses. But I suppose it's better than having nothing to do. It's better than, leeching at home.

The other day I had the first day of this 2 month course. They asked: What are your dreams? Write 3.

What was it....?

Looked in and saw a dark tattered place, littered with scraps and clouded with mist. No maybe I made the mist up. If my thoughts look like that, imagine what a place it must be for the little people living within me. Must be a horrid place.
That's it. I have no dreams. What did I write, I wrote Financial Independence. That's not a dream, more like a desire.

I think some part of me died with my past. And I'm not sure it's a good thing anymore.

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Calling it a night

At 11 PM

I'm going to type a short post and sleep real early. Considering my normal times at 4AM, yes, 11PM is reallll early.

Congrats to Cheemee for her new page in life. I find it very... consoling =) Very happy for you and where on cyberspace have you been? Busy packing I suppose? Maybe the times just doesn't match :)

Saw this really cute picture of DongWan and MinWoo taken during Bong's birthday on 0729. Really cute those two, I'm gonna make it into my wallpaper Heh. I wanna pose like that with someone's birthday cake too~ (Nick? LOL)

The updated post on Dongwan's blog roughly mentions the exceptional coincidence of things you didn't mean to happen, to happen. 缘 was his word. Ain't that the truth :) Still, I'd like to try for specific goals too, no matter what the detours and diversions there may be.

I'm going to start a healthy pattern. Going to Tasek tomorrow. I'll wake up, I swear.

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Updating after forsaking

How long have I visited this blog. Even if it is my own.

My blog should list the things I'm currently feeling/doing? I'm thinking of cooking something after watching Chef Kiss (Ep8). Ears are bouncing with notes from Se7en's 'Digital Bounce'. T.O.P was very nice featuring, love their perf together. The morning air felt cool, I might take up running around nature if it wasn't for the messed up physical adjustments. Tweeting is a new activity, since a lot of people are trending things for people. I should create another account for that purpose.

심심해? 아니주 -- New hobby, creating totally un-understandable Korean words for my own pleasure.

Currently active in almost all Playfish games, give me anything and I'll give back.

Last interesting place went: Bridex for Consumer Fair. It wasn't a total bore, nor was it really interesting. I bought something on impulse to curb the displeasure of being rejected twice ㄱ:( Took some pictures with my partner- y'know, the one that everyone expects to see me going out with. My partner already posted her pictures. I suppose her blog has it too. So I post my own face and it'll be sufficient.

No the pictures didn't turn out like this naturally, I just like my things patchy at the moment.

The greatest entertainment for me nowadays is perhaps spending time with the family (whoever is left in the house), reading books, watching tv shows, playing games, and being a total leech. I wish there's more meaning. I suppose everything can be romanticized and put in a totally interesting light for a blog post. Then again, my mood dictates that this post make everyone get intimate with their brain cells. Go Figure how I'm feeling now. (Isn't there something called Go Fish?)

I hope black pigments are reduced with me not awake during broad daylight.

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Saw Chyi's post regarding her impending reach towards her 1k post.
Early congratulations first.

At this point in my life, I'm back to the sleep-eat-do nothing all day never ending cycle. Occasionally, there's an order to drive family members around. Mpmh, boring, still.

So I was thinkingon one topic lately. Again, about TIME. At one point in time, I would have done one activity with someone, and perhaps, in my whole life, I would have done it with this person only. Therefore, my memories of such activity would only be of this person (and me) no matter what point in time I'm in.

What if, the memories created ain't so memorable? Well, then, it's no fun to look at such activity anymore ain't it?

Fast forwarding time. I got my degree classification. Fair. Satisfactory. What else? I get what I sow, and that is many hours of procrastinating. Many people are buzzing about how their future will be like. How they want to realise their dream future. Where am I going, they ask?

I want to go and create something of my own, far far away. Don't keep asking me why I don't choose this homeland (I must look like someone who's weak-willed or something, maybe double in half once a wind blows my way?) Made up mind and this time, I'm not going to let anything stop me.


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Listening to: Super Junior- 말하지면 (You're my endless love)

MM.. Been almost 2 weeks since I came back from Malaysia. I'm fussing and fidgeting due to the sudden return to having almost nothing to do all day. Although, truth be told, the trip was pretty exhausting with many rush-around, transporting baggage, waiting/chasing after bus and trains, lots of i-don't-know-where-the-heck-I'm-going moments too. Hmm, memory pretty fuzzy actually.

Anyway, pictures to be posted later. I've transported the pictures to HD in order to make room for the many videos of Shinhwa I'm downloading haha.

Read this Chinese novel of... Japanese ghost stories. Some of them are pretty bizarre, outright disgusting if you want to imagine the scenes even. But there's one that particularly stayed in my mind.

It's about a noble in olden days. How, every night after fooling around with his lover, would take the same trishaw back home to his very-rich wife. The story goes on to show his growing disgust towards his wife. But the wife says nothing about how he's changed to a domestically-violent husband.

This noble sometimes get the feeling that the trishaw puller doesn't like him, maybe even mean to harm him, but he has no choice but to take that ride home every time he comes out of the lover's house, else he'd have to walk home- for that was the only trishaw standing by that area.

One night, he was forced to walk home after seeing no sign of the trishaw. But, he sees the puller puling away from his house to another direction. He goes home to find his wife gone, and starts to look for her (he thinks of the wife as his possession, his toy, even if he doesn't like her, she's still his, and what would his father-in-law say?) and started to think the wife ran away with the puller (as she is always seen looking out the front window whenever the noble arrives home)

Just then, the father-in-law's servant came looking for him.


Apparently, the wife committed suicide that night. And her body was taken by the trishaw puller to the father's house. Long ago, before her marriage, a trishaw puller deeply admired the wife. The day of her marriage, he committed suicide. All along, the puller knew of the noble's wrongdoings, and all he did every night was to deliver him back to the wife, so she wouldn't be sad. Now that she's gone, he takes her from the wretched place and puts her back where she would be properly treated.


Interesting. Very moved by the puller's affection, that can last even afterlife. Relationships nowadays are really infected by so many other things that this kind of pureness is rare.

Day 2 of my daised days in WM

This morning started real early.
7 something, I had to follow my cousin to her workplace in MidValley.
It's weird seeing such a big place being so dark, maybe coz I'm not used to the big size of everything here (except for the food portions!)

After breakfast at McDonald's, we went out separate ways, her to her office, and me, to star my adventure of railroads and tarmac roads.

After some bouts of riding and transferring from commuter trains to monorails, I landed myself in TimeSquare, at a time way too early for anyone to visit "-_-

So I had the whole place to myself, somewhat.
I went floor by floor to the 5th floor before my brother and my other cousin Fei showed up. The whole afternoon was spent shopping and buying and more shopping. After which we went to Sungai Wang too, but then by that time we were to exhausted to spend much time shopping. Phew, the last mins spent at Sungai Wang was wet and splashy :(

Lotsa food today, I don't really rmb everything, the brain (and legs) now needs to rest!

Time Square very tall..

Some random shot of a school.

See? I love cityscape views.

MidValley in the early morning, Very eerie to see huge dark shopping mall.

Eating at Johnny's!

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Daised in KL

So,long time no update, and here I am typing on the floor of my cousin's place in KL.

So far so good. My flight from Bn to KL was delayed for 45 mins, hence I arrived here quite late. After 2 hrs plus of plane ride, I rode SkyBus to KL Central, around 1+ hrs? Anyway, all the walking and sitting made me feel as if I took a 6-hr plane ride :S

After much hassle, I arrived at my cousin's place around 10pm. Beat tired and thirsty. Yes I forgot to buy water from the time I disembarked the plane until the taxi ride to cousin's place.

Anyway, the first thing I bought was food (MCD!) And some postcards. Funny enough, those cards are damn big, and the label for them says 'Regular postcards' I should take a picture of them, but they're in my luggage and I'm lazy.

This morning I woke up to see my cousin already off to work, and a set of house keys. Ok, eat sendiri. After replying some text and another nap later, I walked out the taman to find food. The targeted place is South City Plaza. I saw that building on the way home last night, and I think there's KFC there.... Anyway, the walk was around 15 mins tops.

Weather was really hot though, maybe coz it's exactly 12 noon? The building has only some shops left, and after some thinking I ate at this restaurant specialising in Taiwanese dishes (pic above) I ordered the set of the day, which is the Lion Head Rice, or sth. Quite cheap to include drinks and all. The taste is hmm, a bit less pepper can make it better, but for some reason (maybe nostalgia for TW and also the hunger pangs) the rice tasted real Taiwanese like to me. Many memories yo! My 1st lunch in KL for 2010, and I dedicate this to Kar Kuan, who for some reason is not in kl.(?)

Anyway, the building is not huge, and I took time to shop for my mineral water and food for the next 2 days. Also went into book stores, and there's also a book expo, nothing that I like there though. Bought some more postcards (art cards) at RM 1 each. Loves the art. The walk back home was just as uneventful, but I did see some black crows perched around the place, nice.

Ah, Went into an arcade to play too. Guess what, I think the arcade is the same company as the one in the Mall. The name's YES. I distinctly remember UNI arcade in the Mall being operated by YES too. Must confirm later.

One afternoon passed like that and now its 5pm edi. Life's good =)


p.s. Globalization made me less homesick ;) Giant here looks the same as Giant at home!


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我很好

很久没有把刘若英的我很好放出来听
发觉这首歌不止唱着词曲作家的原意，还唱着某段时间，我的成长

听着听着，突然感触好多
那天，我们三人站在西门町的街头上看着MV首播
今天，三人各自在自己的领域土地成长
可能因为近些日子考完试在家闲赋着，纵使生活没有太大改变，仍然觉得自己成长了很多
四年的寒窗苦读（？） 最终落幕
新的生活期待着双手的创造 (看不懂就54我吧）

我好吗？
可能好，可能不好
短短几年间，我们改变了自己，改变了他人。 再也没有几年前的放肆，体力，甚至热情。 观点也改变了- 当然，期望这些改变是对大家都好，虽然改变的成果还未收获。 기데 주새요

I tell people I'm officially unemployed now. But it seems I still have endless tasks to complete before I am able to finally let go and seek a new chapter in life. I guess all of us are still not over the fact that we are now free from books. No matter how often we complain, studying; reading; preparing and cramming for exams have really become a big part of our lives. The fact doesn't stick, so much so that some of us went for a 3-day First Aid Course and came out feeling a bit nostalgic maybe? Or maybe it's just me. How often will I see these people again? Probably soon? Probably never?

Ugh, the body is hurting all over. It's going to be flu season over here. I have yet to contribute a post to Dear Chong's Birthday. I should. But the headache is so strong now I should get to sleep. The Bday post will come belated, but it will be here, I swear.


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Greatness and its road

A lot of things that we become are determined by how we act.

You think big and ambitious, you end up in grand places.

You think "A little is enough" then you'll really get a little.




I... am facing weeds along this bridge. Still organizing.


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